


Of Snack Foods and Daddy Kinks

by Errorcode254



Series: Soulmates of the Tattoo Kind [2]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Sburb/Sgrub Sessions, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Humanstuck, I can't write bro., I like putting characters in awkward positions, M/M, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Soulmates, Tattoos, That's all this au is for me, pretty much just awkward meetings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-03
Updated: 2016-02-03
Packaged: 2018-05-18 00:46:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5891584
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Errorcode254/pseuds/Errorcode254
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which everyone is born with a tattoo of the first words their soul mate will say to them, and Bro's first words to his soulmate are hella lame. Bro and John meet for the first time while John is in college. </p><p>Honestly, I just intend to do the initial meetings for these pairings, so yeah. Sorry.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Of Snack Foods and Daddy Kinks

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry, ok? I just wanted Bro to have a tattoo that showed stuttering and for him to be all "I'm a total sex god" and then turns out, no. he's just a dork that talks about doritos. I'm dumb. And tired. Sorry.

_“Kid, you better not be eating all the Doritos”, you warn, watching Dave's retreating back as his friend nervously watches the exchange._

_“N-no, Mr Strider.”_

The kid fucking stutters. Of course the kid would stutter on that. It's the first time you've met him and you introduce yourself by trying to intimidate them. Well, at least it worked on the weedy kid that's still trying to figure out what to do. 

You smirk at the fact that he called you 'Mr Strider'. You assumed Dave would have clued him in to calling you 'Bro'. Which is when it occurs to you that he called you 'Mr Strider'. Your immediate reaction is to check the tattoo on the inside of your wrist. 

Ever since Dave started school, it's always been about the Mr Strider, so it's become habit to check your wrist when you realise someone has said it. Your eyes widen slightly behind your shades, because oh fuck. The lettering on your tattoo has changed significantly. The letters that were in a generic font have thinned to the point of looking fragile and wispy now, but you have to admit, you're quite fond of the background that has taken shape under the words of your soul mate tattoo. It's faint and barely there, but you can make out the outlines of cogs and wheels. It's a pretty intricate tattoo, actually. 

Your eyes twitch upward to meet his, and oh your god. His mouth is slightly ajar and he's got these fucking teeth. Seriously, no kid should be allowed to look like that. It's just cruel. You're trying to think up something clever to say when he gasps and heads down the hallway. Which is really rude, by the way, because you didn't even get to say something cool as your first words. 

So, naturally you follow him all the way to the bathroom, and you're about to go on a long rant because that would be the _best_ tattoo when you see him twisting in front of the bathroom mirror with his shirt pulled up above one shoulder. You freeze when you notice the tattoo on his shoulder blade in the same pattern as yours, with smoke-like lettering that gives the impression it could all blow away nestled in a background of machinery cogs. It's not the long-winded rant you were hoping for. Instead, it's your remark about eating all the Doritos. 

Shit, did you really say that to your soul mate?

When you think back, you guess you kind of did. You may have been looking at Dave, but you never specified that, and this kid – you don't even know his name – accepted your words as directed at them both when he answered you. 

You're kind of ashamed by this fact. What kind of witty one-liner is 'You better not be eating all the Doritos”? Especially when the tattoo on your wrist always made you imagine some cute person looking up to you like you were some kind of sex god. You just got outdone by some college kid. And they didn't even mean to. 

You are losing your touch. 

This kid is still stretching and trying to see his tattoo and it's actually pretty amusing to watch. You finally take pity on the poor guy and pull your phone out of your pocket to take a photo of the tattoo for him. He jumps so high that you're pretty sure he might have broken a world record when you put your hand on his shoulder to get him to stop moving so that you can get a detailed photo. The detail in the tattoo isn't something you want distorted in the photo, since it's so light in comparison to the letters. 

When you finally get a photo that you can deal with you help him pull his shirt back down before handing him the phone. 

“As great as it was to see you trying practising your contortionist routine in my bathroom, I think this is an easier way to check yourself out.”

“Thanks.” He takes the phone from you and you hold your wrist out for him to compare your own tattoo to his. And because you weren't able to take a perfect photo, so the detail on your tattoo might make up for the lack of detail in the picture. He sits on the edge of the tub and pulls your hand down beside the picture. 

“That's really what it looks like, now?” 

“Yeah, kid, mine changed too. I asked someone about it once, because my tattoo was something that I hear a lot. Turns out that it's for that exact reason. Apparently the instances of someone's first words being 'hello' are pretty high, so the tattoo changes when you finally meet your soul mate so that you can tell who it is. Mind you, you must have a pretty lame soul mate if the first thing they say to you is 'hello'. What's your name, anyway? I can't keep calling you kid.”

“John.”

**Author's Note:**

> Send me pairing ideas for this au. nopethefuckout.tumblr.com
> 
> Awkward meetings are the bomb.


End file.
